I'm prone to nightmares.
Nightmares, and all of their brethren.
Dreams that twist, and morph, and become something terrible.
Nightmares that start off bad, and just get worse.
Imageless attacks of fear, and panic.
Dreams that don't seem scary on the surface, but somehow strike fear in me.
Once my head hits the pillow, it's like nothing is barred from my mind. Traumas in life that, in the daytime world no longer effect me, are brought back to their day-one virulent state. The twists, the turns, the torment. I don't realize how painful it is until I claw myself awake, shuddering, gasping. Those few nights of pitch-black dreamless sleep are so amazing that I wake up proud of myself for not remembering my REM state. Tonight, I fell asleep for maybe half an hour-- And then they hit me. I woke up shaking. Maybe tomorrow night won't be as bad.
I need a hug.
-Violet.
Wow, the anxiety and panic sounds terrible....
ReplyDeleteI suffer from hypersomnia, its the reverse of insomnia where I can not get up. What helps me falling too deep into REM sleep is playing music while I sleep... Playing iTunes continually until its tie to wake up.
...I wish I was there to help...
Ah, it'll be okay lil camper :-) Nightmares are part of life...but sorry you're stuggling with them now. I was in a bad car accident 3 weeks ago, and for the last few nights I've had dreams of being rearended in my new car.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, we're with you...and we'll keep the baddies away so you can get some restful sleep.
I have hypersomnia as well, Forbidden. I also have experienced cataplexy, sleep paralysis, and hypnagognic hallucinations. Basically, if my REM state occurred slightly sooner, I'd be classified as narcoleptic. It can be very scary at times when I can't move or wake up. Almost more scary than the actual nightmare. I also can't fall
ReplyDeletesleep listening to music, or with any outside distractions what so ever, which is unfortunate due to the fact that I need a lot more sleep in order to function than some people.
You know, I just bought a Dreamcatcher for someone's birthday - maybe I should get your one for Christmas. Hugs I can certainly provide :)
ReplyDeleteFlagg, I think I know who you're talking about-- That's such a cute gift! I hope she likes it. :]
ReplyDelete